Personal Internal Management Tools for Overseeing Stress
/BY: COACH JOHN HOUMES
We are in a new normal. Every day is full of ambiguity and shifting challenges.
Many people are asking, “How do I keep the momentum going?”
Owners are asking this about their businesses, professionals about their careers, and entrepreneurs about their projects.
Do you see the tension? Everyone wants to keep moving forward and advancing in a world that changes every few days.
This tension produces stress, anxiety and exhaustion.
How are you doing with personal internal management? How are you handling the stress? The anxiety? The exhaustion?
One of the pitfalls of this season is to ignore how you’re doing internally and just keep pushing forward. But, personal internal management may be the very key to keeping your momentum.
So, how do you oversee your stress and manage the anxiety of this season? Here are a few things to consider:
1. Recognize That Everything Has Changed
Let’s say that your career, business or project was like driving a sports car going 75mph down the interstate. You could hit the gas, move around traffic and get where you wanted to go, besides the times you had to sit in traffic.
This season is more like driving an econo-car on a slick back street full of potholes, speed bumps and sharp turns. Recognizing the change is crucial. If you drive that econo-car like the sports car on the interstate, you will ruin it. It may get through it, but it will come out the other side with some permanent damage.
You’re the same way. You can’t operate in this season like you did in the last. Things that were easy are going to be hard. Tasks that didn’t take much energy may exhaust you. This is all normal in the midst of this challenging season. But, if you try and just push through it, you will eventually run out of momentum from sheer exhaustion.
Write down everything that is different about your work, relationships, and home life from two months ago. Count how many things have changed. Take a moment to let that sink in.
2. Decipher Between the Controllable and Uncontrollable
Stress is only added when you confuse something you can control with something you can’t. You can call your clients, show concern for them, and show them your value, but you can’t force them to hold on to your service.
You can push marketing on social media and respond to those who are interested, but you can’t control the fact that your revenue is falling.
You can control how you behave, act and think, but you can’t control what others do.
Does deciphering between the two really matter? Yes! Because much of your stress comes from getting the controllable confused with the uncontrollable. If you find yourself focused on one particular thing, ask if it is something you can or can’t control. If you can’t, detach your thoughts from it and move onto something you can control.
You will keep momentum by focusing on the things you can actually change.
3. Don’t Personalize Something That’s Impersonal
Some people are more in tune to relational dynamics than others. For these people, this season may find an added stress: relational loss.
When your favorite client changes their agreement due to their finances, that is stressful enough. But, processing that relational loss adds another level of stress.
Oversee that stress by reminding yourself of the difference between what is personal and impersonal. For instance, remind yourself, “they said they benefited from our service, but they don’t have the money.” This isn’t about us or the quality of our product. It is about their finances.”
Distinguishing the difference between impersonal and personal will help you keep momentum and process the loss in a healthy way. Confusing the two may slow you down as you spend time licking a personal wound that was never meant to be personal.
4. Find a Radical Diversion
Find something that takes you out of your normal and puts you somewhere else mentally. Maybe this is gardening, video games or a conversation about a personal interest. Take the time to find that hobby or activity that helps you escape in a healthy way. This will allow you to recharge. Like a car needs gas to keep going, you must recharge to keep momentum.
Part of keeping momentum during this time could be more about you managing yourself internally than anything else. Watch for emotional exhaustion. Write down what is causing stress, and then use these tools to overcome it.